It's now the end of my trip, time to say goodbye to Holland, at least for now. I can't even begin to say how much this trip has meant and how much I've changed from this experience. I definitely had some challenges and difficulties throughout my time here, but I wouldn't change a single thing for the world. I got to see so many wonderful things, travel to new places, eat new foods, learn to adapt, and met some amazing people that will be in my life for years to come.
One of the biggest changes for me is learning to appreciate the time you have with people while you're living it. I think a lot of times, especially in America, we are always looking forward with our blinders on and rarely ever take the time to sit down and enjoy the beauty in front of us. I know there was one instance in Holland when I was in a park, sitting on a bench next to a great friend, looking at the trees and the moment brought me to tears. It was a cloudy day and there were fireworks going off all over the city because it was close to New Year's, and I just sat there on that bench and teared up because I knew that I would never have another moment in my life exactly like that one. I'm starting to sound cheesy, but hey, that's what these final blogs are for, right?
Another thing I learned to start doing is to say "no" to things. You would think that with this whole experience I would be saying "yes" to more things, but I found that the opposite was more beneficial. Let me explain. I found that I continually said "yes" to many outings when I wasn't feeling up to it or had no desire to go simply because I didn't want to feel like I was missing out on anything. I wanted to be a part of the story. However, I found that when I went along to these events that didn't appeal to me, I wouldn't enjoy myself, and therefore had the potential of ruining the experience for someone that wanted to be there. My biggest step in this new decision-making process was New Year's. Everyone in the entire International house was either already out of the country, or going to Amsterdam. I really didn't feel up to going anywhere at all; all I wanted to do was spend a quiet evening to myself and watch some movies. When I told my housemates that I wasn't going I got a lot of "Oh.... are you sure? You'll be here all by yourself. That just seems sad." But I stuck to my decision and I'm glad I did. It was drizzling the whole night, everyone had to walk very far to get in anywhere and also had trouble getting into bars because they didn't have tickets. All the while I was warm at home in my room watching some movies, relaxing, and watching the fireworks from my window.
I will never forget my time in Holland because it has helped shape me into the person I am today (and she's pretty cool). I made friends that I couldn't imagine my life without. And, most importantly, I have become someone who can contribute more to the world than I could before. So, Holland, this isn't goodbye, it's until the next time.
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